The Confidence Game

You gotta have confidence. But too much of it can cloud your judgment.

By Miles Hall

Anyone starting and/or running a business must have a strong confidence level. You could call it ego. Back in the 1980s when Jayne and I started our business we had no real guides, so trying to get folks to see, understand, and support this new concept in business was tough. We built, designed, adjusted, and boldly went where none had successfully gone before. As a result, what came to be known as the “Shooting Sports Complex” was born.

We were both very young, but determined to not only survive but to prevail. In this journey we typically heard way more negative responses than positive. As a result, I got bolder and honestly more arrogant. Doing so was a total defensive move; just underneath the bluster was a very scared young and inexperienced mind worrying that maybe this was not going to work. Not that I would have ever admitted that to any outsider.  Here is the reality: you get so consumed with building, innovating, and overcoming that you start to believe you are superior. You quit being a learner. Ultimately, that attitude will eat you alive, and if not changed, will kill you and the business. There’s another problem as well—that attitude often attracts the worst kind of souls to you. These are folks we would call sharks and leaches. Every business has them, but your ego prevents you from seeing them clearly. Into that churning mix, however, were some angels with good council and advice. We were fortunate that we had many such folks, yet the struggle was identifying them as my ego and fear of failure didn’t allow for rational thought. But eventually my head cleared, and I learned to separate the wheat from the chaff.

Today, in working with many businesses inside our industry I see the same kinds of issues. Sadly, there are lots of examples. Here are just two. An accountant who befriended the owners, and with the conniving spirit of a turncoat spy irredeemably harmed the business to the point of failure; an evil partner who took full advantage of the other partner while he was attending to his wife’s battle with cancer and left the man with staggering losses and missing funds.

Some problems are self-induced. On one of our consulting jobs the owner chastised us for expressing our worries about the shop manager, who we believed was acting in bad faith. No amount of argument on our part could persuade him otherwise. We opted to move on and not long after that, this manager took all the money in the bank account (which the owner gave full access to) and locked him out of his own POS system. 

I’ve saved the best for last. This is what’s known as the “poison friend.” These types smile to your face, but behind you they stand poised with a dagger and talk trash about you. They tell others just how great they are, and that they are going to “save” the company. Once they gain your trust and friendship they will ruin you. 

And yet, in the middle of all this evil we have found true angels, folks without ulterior motives. They were caring souls who wanted to help make things work for us. You can spot them as they are consistently supportive, honest, and show a genuine care for you and the well-being of the business. But in order for them to help you, you must be receptive to their message. We all get defensive when we receive even “constructive” criticism. Remember what I said about fear and ego? A terrible combination! You need people by your side who are willing to give you an honest assessment. They are like the golden goose that lays the golden egg. Treasure them.

Listen to their constructive comments and learn. Here is an example. A dealer/range owner had a banker who was older and, as such, was wiser than other bankers I had seen. He saw the challenges and opportunities for this business. He spotted issues and opportunities quickly; furthermore, he was not ashamed to “tell it like he saw it.” The owners followed his guidance and prospered. In reviewing their business books, we found that this man and his bank were a large part of the great impact the business had in that state and in our industry.

Dealing with people of bad faith is an unavoidable fact of life. The Simple Truth is once you have your head screwed on straight (dump the ego), you will be in a position to see them for who they really are. Then you can welcome the true angels into your circle.